The news today about Cameron Stewart and Warren Ellis, and the renewed conversation about harmful people in the comics industry, got me thinking today.
A common response you hear when a creator gets revealed as a bad actor is that people say “I hate that their body of work has been ruined for me now!” and a rebuttal to that I often think about is “what about the body of work that we’ll never see from the people they hurt”
I was thinking about that today when I realised that I fall into that former category. I hurt someone close to me and it led to them becoming disillusioned with creating comics.
Unlike the revelations of today, my actions were not of a lascivious nature but they were hurtful all the same and I need to take full responsibility for them. That’s why I am permanently removing myself from the online comics community.
I co-created a comic with my then-friend and collaborator Traci Shepard. We took it to Kickstarter and it was successfully funded. It was my responsibility to fulfill the rewards and pay Traci her share of what was left over.
This didn’t happen as it should have. There are, what I still believe to be legitimate, reasons why it didn’t that I don’t want to get into because it will come off as an excuse. I need to take responsibility for my failings and I failed Traci and our backers.
Over the course of about eighteen months, I kept telling Traci that I would resolve the issue but all I was doing was kicking the can down the road. I didn’t know how to fix it, so I stalled and stalled, all the while eroding the trust of my friend.
Last year, Traci went public with what had happened and people learned the truth. With my actions revealed, I hurt more friends and followers who believed me to be a trustworthy person.
I put my head down, did what I could to remedy the situation and disappeared online for several months, before slowly making a return to the online comics community. As of writing, it has not been fully resolved, again due to my cowardice and inaction.
As a result of my actions, I hurt someone I cared about and I tainted the act of drawing and comics creation for someone with immense talent. I tried to move on like I did nothing wrong, but I don’t deserve to.
This is why I have made the decision to remove myself from the online comics community permanently and with immediate effect. I will no longer use this account, or @WednesdayReads and all Good Egg Podcasts are now cancelled.
Going forward, I will be making every effort to finally resolve an issue that has hung over my head for years. I don’t not expect, nor do I deserve, to resume my place within this community once it is resolved.
I am sorry to Traci. I am sorry to everyone else that has felt hurt or betrayed by my actions. I’m sorry to everyone that has supported me, including the listeners of our podcasts and our supporters on Patreon.
I’m sorry to all of my friends whose trust I betrayed by presenting myself one way while acting another way that they couldn’t have possibly known about. I miss you, especially Chris and Elle, but I understand why we aren’t friends anymore.
I’m sorry to my fiancée Helena as I know how much she enjoys podcasting and I’m taking that away from her. I love you and I hope I can grow into a person that’s worthy of you.
I have posted this thread on GoodEggPodcasts.com in case you want to read as a statement rather than dozens of tweets.
I’m going to remain on Twitter with my private personal account, which is @KieranShiach. I only accept follow requests from those close to me, but if you need to talk to me my DMs on this account are open and I will speak to anyone that wants to, even if it’s just to shout at me.
This is the end of the thread. Thank you for reading. I’m sorry if this thread missed the mark in some way, I tried to make it clear that I take full responsibility and not excuse myself. I’m sorry I let so many people down.